I’m sorry, This is a semi serious note. Can someone explain the value of teaching a child that they are and will never be good enough? I bet that creates well adjusted, successful, people. The kind of people who’s successes allow them to have their complex, deeply rooted, personal issues be treated by the very finest psychoanalysts.

Oh yeah, Twilight. Before I start I should mention that I only got about half way through this movie and spent the other half in the movie theater lobby playing Time Crisis. I also have not read any related books. The plot is as follows: new girl in town meets an unusual boy at her new high school. Boy saves girl from minivan, girl falls in love with boy, boy introduces girl to family, boy shows girl his extensive music collection. All this but with vampires.

A prominent New York news paper recently published an article stating that there is a good chance that your conception was due, in part, to the music of Kenny G. A recent poll shows that 97 percent of babies were made to Kenny G’s 1986 album, Duotones.